Cancer Blog #69
By Brian Zimmerman
Begun on July 31, 2021
Email: dyingman1@yahoo.com
My Dying Words
Entry #69– Abides Forever
January 28, 2023
[Isa 40:6-8] 6 A voice says, “Call out.” Then he answered, “What shall I call out?” All flesh is grass, and all its loveliness is like the flower of the field. 7 The grass withers, the flower fades, When the breath of the LORD blows upon it; Surely the people are grass. 8 The grass withers, the flower fades, But the word of our God stands forever.
Flowers are a particular love of my wife’s – she never grows tired of their beauty, their colors, their shape, their smell. But, the amount of work to reduce their impermanence is astonishing: the constant weeding, fertilizing, pruning (in blooming bushes), spraying to kill pests, and the seemingly never ending watering. Even with all that it seems such a short time before they grow, bud, bloom, and the fade. My focus is the lawn: I pay a lawn service to weed and feed for controlling dandelions, wild violets, as well as grubs, and careful mowing (when and how high). This doesn’t even count wiregrass, a virtually indestructible weed (grass it ain’t!)! Then there are varmints to get rid of – moles, voles, and skunks. Even with all that effort, it still depends on the right temperature and watering for the grass to look healthy. Isaiah picked a most apt picture of our lives, of human life. Humans can look lovely and healthy, but our lives, like the grass and the flowers, are much work to maintain and to protect. Just yesterday, at the oncologist’s office, I was having my blood drawn. While doing so, I talked to the techs. Of course they knew I had cancer and told me they had heard a story like mine many times. Patients would tell them that they had had no health issues and suddenly, out of nowhere, they were diagnosed with a terminal illness – cancer.
Isaiah in this passage reminds us of the insubstantial nature of our lives – a time perhaps of beauty like a flower or greenness and growth like grass, but that time of life is soon over. Our lives will end, and like the grass and flower, the place where we lived will not remember us. One day the breath of the Lord will blow on you as it does on the grass and flower and your time in this age will be ended. But, Isaiah offers us hope, for he goes on to say that there is a permanence if we have eyes to see, ears to hear, and minds to understand. For God’s word will never “be over”, it will never end. In the NT we find that it is the breath of God that creates the scriptures, which can never be broken, never abrogated, never wither or fade. Unlike our current lives, God has spoken His word to teach us that death does not have to be the end for us, that there can be life for us to look forward to when we fade and our loveliness in finished. The surest word of all is Jesus, the creator and redeemer, the hope of eternity. He’s the joy of all the fallen creation and our hope and joy too, when we bow the knee to Him and serve Him without being distracted by the heat, diseases and pests that plague our lives while we live in this current age, this “yard” we now struggle in.
Next: The Mighty Stubble
Medical Update
I thought I’d just give a quick update on my medical situation since my last treatment (last Wednesday, February 1). It’s not been an easy transition to the 3 drug routine. My neuropathy has gotten worse, though the oncology nurse practitioner said that none of the 3 drugs have neuropathy as a side effect, so it has to be the one drug that was dropped (Taxol). Maybe it will improve, I hope. It makes walking painful at times and picking up things more difficult. And, I continue to have “attacks” at times during which my neuropathy gets much worse, my eyes get sensitive to light, and my brain is in a fog, and my legs feel really weak making my balance less sure. The attack usually lasts 30 minutes or so, but the other symptoms I listed never really go away. My eyes are much more irritated this time as well. I don’t have another treatment for a week (Friday, February 17), so maybe by then things will have calmed down. The Lord sustains in all these things, as He has in the past. And, my wife and friends are always there for me. A great comfort indeed!